Have you ever spoken to your fear? Yeah I know this may sound a bit crazy but I am serious. Have you ever sat down, grabbed a piece of paper and allowed yourself to go inside and communicate with your fears? I just did it today, as I am working on moving forward with expanding my business and a lot of my fear is coming up. Truthfully, a lot of my fear is coming up to stop me from truly achieving what I want. I grabbed my journal and began digging deeper inside, chipping away at what was really causing me to be scared, to be consumed by fear and to feel stuck.
As I did this I was brought back to a time in my life where ED (EATING DISORDER) consumed my daily thoughts. For that was a time in my life when fear not only showed up from time to time, like it does now, but was literally my being.
While I was trying to break free from ED, I had conversations with it like I had today and though the language was different, though the topic was about something else, one common denominator existed = fear.
For it is fear that keeps us stuck in whatever cycle we continue to walk through.
For it is fear that allows us to remain within our comfort zone, whether than be with our relationship with food, our bodies, our partners, our friends, our family members, our jobs, our activity level and/or our love for ourselves.
For it is fear that keeps us from truly achieving the potential that we were all meant to and worthy of achieving in this life-time.
I wanted to share this with you because wherever you are at in your life, whether you are living with an Eating Disorder or not, I KNOW that you can relate to this feeling that I am talking about. I KNOW that just like myself, FEAR has shown up in your life multiple times and tried to stop you from moving forward in the true direction you would like it to go.
So the question is what do you do? Well like the title of a great book I read…. FEEL THE FEAR AND DO IT ANYWAYS.
Fear is not going to kill you, throw you in jail or ruin your life. Fear is just a set of emotions and thought patterns that’s sole purpose is to keep you stuck – yet it has a clever way of thinking that it is protecting you (which in some cases it is) but in many cases it is rather stunting your growth and keeping you on a never ending hamster wheel. The hamster wheel of dieting, staying in that relationship that isn’t serving you, staying in a job you hate or staying stuck in any place you know you want to be unstuck from!
So here’s what you do – write about it – have a conversation with your fear and figure out why it is even showing up. Once you can see why it is there – acknowledge that it is just fear – then CHOOSE to think differently, CHOOSE to feel this fear and do whatever it is you want to do anyways.
The CHOICE is always in your hands.
P.S. Let me know your thoughts of this in the comment box.
Paula Galli,
Motivational Coach, Nutritional Counsellor & Self-Esteem Expert
It’s so true. I heard a Protestant minister call fear “just Satan trying to steal the peace that Christ died to give you”! That thought made me think, “like hell you will!” Lol! Lately, I have been finding it really useful to just redirect my thoughts by saying, “Wellness is my purpose!” It’s amazing how this clears my mind and helps me think of what to do next for my own physical, mental, and spiritual wellbeing and for others as well. Wellness can be everyone’s purpose. What could be more important? Even Jesus spent his time healing and forgiving and teaching others to do the same. He was a guru of wellness and love <3 I just think that is cool.
Hi Paula,
I’m curious to know, what kind of questions do you ask your fear to get the conversation moving?
thanks
Looking forward to this new course
I did this exercise on my own several months ago, and it was amazing. I need to do it again regarding my wanting to start a business. This post is SO true. Thank you for it and good luck on expanding your business, you have helped me very much and I would love to see you be able to help even more people!
There isn’t enough room to tell you all that I have gone thru, related to fear including attempted murder, rape, forced marriage to the perpatrator, threats to my life on a regular basis…finally escaped, leaving my children behind only to see them abused, alcoholism, mistaken diagnosis of a mental illness. Marriage to an alcoholic/womanizer & betrayal in the end. If it hadn’t have been for my unshakeable faith & the grace of God, I’d be dead. So, I’m trying to learn to love myself after so many have despised & abused me. Yes, the 20 extra lbs may leave when they’re ready & my regular meditation practice is helping me find my “true self”. I pray that others will find their own way too. Namaste & Peace: Marilyn
Hi Paula,
As I was scrolling down my emails I stopped at yours and seeing ED in the text, payed special attentions to it.
I had ED for almost 10 years. Do to immigration rules I was forced to leave my 9 y.o child behind in order for us to imigrate to Canada. As the process went on it took four and a half years not 2 like I was told. Being mom was all I knew and who I was at the moment. As I was trying to feel big hole in my soul with food, ED slowly took over me and my life. Feeling fear was natural state of mind for all those 10 years. I always had a thought that the moment I would be able to get out o the mental ED jail, I will be free an will do anything I want. My miraculous recovery happens in January 2012… I ask God and all the Angels to help me, save me from the constant fear. And my prayers were heard an answered. Till this day I really don’t know how it actually happened, but the ED voice disappeared. I just knew my fight was over. Now living with out ED for a year and a half, I am very happy I can peacefully fall asleep and eat food enjoying every piece o it, but my fears are still there. I don’t have a job, no place to live ( thank God for my family) but I dream of being independent and at the same time, every thought of going to work I freeze with not knowin what is it that I can do. I always dreamed of helping people with similar problem I used to have, but seeing all this pain makes me so very sad. I feel like I’m standing on cross road and don’t know which direction to take.
Thank you Paula, reading your email gave me feeling I’m not alone as there is always hope.
May all your dreams come true!
Kristina
Thank you from the bottoms of my heart !!!!!
Hi Paula, I really loved your post. It is very insightful and so very true. I found for me that speaking with my fear after I meditate is the best way for me to access all my limiting beliefs, and bypass them. I am not sure yet if it is fear of failure or fear of success which is limiting me, but I am working on that. Thank you for your honesty and sharing your story with us!
Be well, Audrey
What could we accomplish if we weren’t afraid?
I heard or read that somewhere.
Fear is a rut.